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CHANGE IN VIEW


My dad got transferred to Bhandara after I cleared my 10th. At that time Bhandara was considered as area with religious rivalries and Naxalite activities. I was told not to go outside during night times because some guys move around looking for lonely guys and will beat them just for fun. There were some groups who will kill you and no police action will be taken. I thought they were just joking to kid around new guy in the city. It's later I got they were not joking. This incident happened when I was near civil lines, don't remember why I was there that time but I was. All of sudden three guys came from some where with stumps and started beating me, I still don't know the reason, might be just because I was so robust they might have thought I belong to some other group, whatever it was. A police constable came running to help me out and they all ran away. He said to me, “What the hell you were doing with those guys, you appear to be from good family blah blah blah....”. I thanked him for help and went home.

So first thing that was told proved to be true, I decided to check out for the second and moved out when it darkened and to my surprise again they were right I have to keep eyes everywhere to keep myself protected form guys standing by. I decided let's check out is it really fun to beat someone with no reason. So next time when I went outside I sat near Z P chowk and was waiting for some prey. There was a wine shop to the third corner of Spice Restaurant which was right in front of me. A drunkard came out and was shouting some f**king words, there was no one around, I thought this is right time. I ran towards him and beat him down then I ran back to my home. My heart beat had been increased and I was feeling guilty for beating someone for no reason, it was quite clear there is no fun in doing such shit eating pig's job. Next day I went up on roof and sat thinking about them why they might me doing such cheap thing. I sat for long time thinking in my way to know answer for why?. Then I realized I might be thinking in wrong way so I tried to figure out what they might be thinking while doing this shit job, and I got the answer they are like this since their childhood so it is not possible to change them that easy. You can't change yourself in a day how you gonna change them all better way become more stronger and give them what they try to give you “The Fear”. How I did that is next story to tell for now I understood, “Sometimes it's better to think in a way your opponent thinks to challenge his authority of might.”

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HE IS ELDER BROTHER OF RANJEET


I was in 12th class and it was mid-term exam and 12th class students are meant to sit with 10th class students. For every paper I reach 15 min earlier, that day wasn't any exception. I sat on my sit and took out all the stuff needed for paper. A girl came and sat next to me she was in 10th class. She saw my name on my writing pad and asked me, “Is your name Nrupen Masram.”, I replied, “Yes”, “Are you elder brother of Ranjeet.” again I said, “Yes”. She called her friends near, “He is elder brother of Ranjeet.”. I was amazed, “What is so special?”. She said, “Bhaiya Ranjeet is mind freak geek of the class he frequently challenge class teachers he can teach better than them and also proves it every time. You might be knowing this you are his elder brother.”. The fact was that Ranjeet never told at home he often challenge teachers like that by the way he use to tell everyone I am the one who teaches him. This is one of the biggest joke for me because he was very cleaver since his childhood so cleaver that sometimes when I was unable to understand what the topic reveals I would give him the book and ask him to read and explain me. He was always that cleaver, now he is also pursuing his Computer Science and Engineering Degree like me and though I am elder I always need help from his master brain.

Whenever we went together his friends used to point us as Ranjeet and his elder brother. He rarely used to sit among my friends because for them Ranjeet was my younger brother, by the way that was long time ago. Now many of my friends consider him mastermind when comes to subject he is reading. He was with me since childhood and I got used to see him like brain-man, he still is much better learner and hard worker than me and always deserves a better place for him over me. But sometimes I became angry over him just because if we have covered same subjects from same books and he knows less than me, it's just because since we were together I never heard him say, “I don't know this”. By the way next time you see us together don't refer him as my younger brother refer me as Elder Brother of Ranjeet.

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I AM JUST FADE UP OF GOD


I was nearly 13-14 year old when I felt like getting some hope in me. I was sheer believer of science and still I am. My Mom and Dad were sheer believers of God. My Mom still prays each and every God that ever appeared in Hindu mythology and my Dad is great devotee of Lord Shiva. They use to teach us believe in God by telling us mythological stories, by the way when any special condition use to come, I use to wonder how can this situation can be true it is exactly opposite of what science tells us. It was always hard to believe there really exist anything like supreme power with name like Gods have. However I never had any guts to oppose anything said by parents but after the rickshaw puller incident I was gaining little charge coz I was becoming aggressive. My Dad use to fast twice a week while we suppose to wonder which day of week Mom will not fast because there is always any occasion on behalf of some God to fast. I can't remember any of her fasting had ever bought any laurels to family but what I can see is she is still suffering from many kinds of nutrients deficiencies. Also you can't go to cut your hairs before Sunday, in fact only Sunday is the day for haircut. It also sometimes included restrictions on what to eat which day and at what time.

It was like fateful day for my parents when this happened. I directly opposed to believe existence of God. I was reluctant to listen them and I was standing on same view,“i can't believe on anything which I can't see, listen, feel. I had never seen it, not heard, not even ever felt its existence. Please pardon me from now i'll not believe its existence.”. I was strong on my point and I was not ready to listen anything kiddish to believe there is something like God having several hands or faces. There is only one thing that is available in universe other than non-living things and that is life and I am just a little part of that life. Please never try to convince me that there exist any supreme force like God because i'll not believe unless and until you have any powerful evidence that will prove its existence. I can't take more of it because I AM FADE UP OF GOD.

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